I've been waiting for her to ask because she's insinuated it a few times but I was hoping she wasn't that stupid. I guess I was wrong.
My mom has been in my life now for 3 years. I still have a tinge of hatred for her but even if I didn't and things were great, I don't feel she should have the privilege of seeing such a wonderful thing when she skipped 75% of my life.
Where was she during all the other important stuff in my life? Now she wants to be here for me? I just can't even fathom the idea.
Imagine what that would do to my family, the people who have been there for me all these years. That would be a slap in their face and really a slap in my own.
Allen and I haven't really talked about who would be there but we have talked about who wouldn't be there. Allen said it was my decision since it was going to be me going through everything and we agreed I would feel very uncomfortable with his mom, or anyone in his family, there. We also agreed my mother would most definitely not be there. But as for who would, I don't know. I would love for my dad to be there but I think that would be kind of weird. But when we get closer to that day, we'll decide. As for now, we're leaning towards keeping it simple and not letting anyone back there during the delivery. I think that's the only fair way to do it, since I have so many "mothers." I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings having to choose. But when we get closer to the due date, I guess we'll talk again. But I don't think anything can happen to make us change our minds about my mother being there.
Now, I have to find a way to tell her HELL NO without hurting her feelings too bad. And I want to make sure she knows why I'm saying no.
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