Still pregnant, still miserable

Well, I'm down to 8 days now and I'm still hanging in there.

My family's Christmas is this weekend so I'm hoping I can hold off at least for that. Plus, I'm still trying to get some stuff done at work so that I'm not laying on a table in the hospital getting ready to be cut open wondering if I forgot to do a story for the newspaper.

But, I'm so ready for this to be over.

Anyway, I am clumsy person so when I made it to 8 months pregnant without falling down, I felt like I had accomplished something! But then, it happened. I fell down. Dang it! I had almost made it. And then, this week, I fell down again! Dang it!

Falling down when you are pregnant is a terrifying feeling but the further along you are, the more terrifying it is. As you are falling, you are contemplating which way to turn so that you don't hurt the baby and most of the time, you don't hurt the baby but you do hurt yourself. So, I've been hurting since my fall. The baby is all wiggly and jiggly still so he's okay but man, I am not feeling so hot. My back hurts, my lower stomach hurts and I swear, I need to wear bubble wrap the next week.

Even though I'm ready for this to be over, I do have some sad feelings about it. This could very well be my last pregnancy. I had hoped for a family of 3 kids but Allen seems content with two and after this last pregnancy, I'm not sure I am up for another round. Plus, even if I could convince Allen to go for a third, there's a 50/50 chance a third kid would be a boy. I'd probably die if I found out we were having ANOTHER BOY. Holy crap, three boys would send me to a special place. A really special place.

So, I guess we'll see. But the reality is, this could be the last time I have a little baby in my belly kicking and moving around. That is definitely the greatest feeling ever. And I will miss that. This little one has been very active the past month or so. He wasn't very active at first but all of a sudden, he's wiggling and jiggling everywhere. I love to lay down and watch my tummy move about. It's a great feeling and despite the other horrors this pregnancy has brought, seeing him move about makes it all better.

I'm excited about meeting him, him as in Devin. That's what we are naming him. We just decided a few weeks ago so I guess I can start calling him that now. I wonder if he'll be like Corbin or if he'll be the complete opposite. I secretly hope he's more like me. Corbin is like his daddy so it's only fair that Devin is like me. I imagine a little blonde, hair, blue eyed boy. But, if he's not, that's okay too.

Even though I'm super ready for this one to hold out, I do hope he makes it to the 21st. That's the date he's been given and I think it would be neat to actually be able to do this without the craziness of "OMG, my water broke, we have to go NOWWWW!"

The thought of a c-section is not fun. I mean, the whole fun of being pregnant is that OMG feeling when you find out you are in labor. But since my body is not allowing me to give birth naturally and I have to have a c-section, I would like it to be all nice and planned out. I'd like to show up on the 21st, get this little boy out of me and live happily, ever after. Besides, the 21st is Allen's birthday and I think it's super special we are having Devin on his birthday. So, I'd like to make it to the 21st. Eight more days!

Holy heartburn

So, I have 10 more days and quite frankly, I'm starting to hope I don't make it the next 10 days. I hope I go now. Like right now. That's how miserable I am!

This pregnancy has sucked. Seriously. It has been the worst 9 months ever! I've been sick constantly and I have felt like crap for 9 months straight. There has been no pregnancy glow this time. The best thing about this pregnancy will be when this child gets out of my stomach and into my arms.

Last week, I developed some sort of cold/flu. I woke up coughing, sniffling, aching and throwing up. I had it for a whole week and because of work, I couldn't take off a single day. That probably prolonged it and made it last longer. But I'm trying to get all my stuff done at work to prepare for both me and my publisher's absence.

I have spread the fun to Allen and Corbin and I feel awful. My poor little boy had a temperature over 100 degrees for like 3 days and now he's coughing and crying like it's hurting. I hope he feels better soon because he's breaking my heart. I tried really hard to stay away from him but when you live with someone, it's hard to stay away!

So, on top of all the typical pregnancy sickness, I've had to deal with this nasty mess too.

Now, I've moved on to having heartburn and let me tell you, if you have never had heartburn, I pray you never experience it. It is the worst thing ever. It's like someone has reached inside your chest and is squeezing the crap out of your chest. It burns, it aches, it hurts! I never had heartburn with Corbin. After he was born, I experienced mild heartburn for like a day. With this kid, I've had it maybe 2-3 times and it hasn't been so bad. But the past few days, I've developed severe heartburn, so bad it's making me throw up. I've taken to eating Tums, one after another. It's the only relief I have found so far.

Everything that has happened thus far I've been able to brave but heartburn, I can't handle it. I would rather continue barfing than deal with this.

I am hopeful I can make it until Dec. 21 which is when I'm scheduled for my c-section. I still have things that need to get done but if I continue to feel like this, I won't be getting anything done anyway so he may as well come on now!

I know once he gets here, I'll forget all this mess. It's just hard to see it right now because it's been so miserable.

So, here's to Tums and December 21.

Down to the short rows

Well I'm down to the short rows, as they say, and right now, I am very miserable. I'm at that stage where I want this baby out of me! I'm having a lot of problems this go around and I will be happy when it's over.

So, by my calculations, I have 17 days until my surgery date. Now, whether I make it that long is up to this little fella. I hope he waits because I am not ready! Our house is not ready, our finances are not ready, and well, I'm just not ready. But, on the other hand, I don't know if I can keep this baby in me 17 more days.

On top of everything else, I started sniffling this weekend and by Monday, I was sick. I feel horrible. My nose is all runny, my head feels like it's going to explode and I just feel like crap. Oh and I'm back to barfing again. Great! Of course, you can't take but certain medications and I don't like to medicate myself when pregnant but this time, I went and bought me some doctor-approved meds and am taking them now. I hope it kicks this thing, whatever it is, out of me.

I'm excited about meeting the little guy. He's driven me crazy for nine whole months and I am wondering what he'll be like. Hopefully because he's made me so sick, he'll be a nice, quiet, happy baby. I guess we'll see.

And, I'm a little scared too. Boys are a handful and Corbin is a gigantic handful. Soon, I will have two of them!